Arguing is like doing karate. Both are misinterpreted as something aggressive where one party defeats the other. However the philosophy behind karate teaches its followers to be “inwardly humble and outwardly gentle”, because only this way can anyone stay focused and be open to a real […]
Last year I did not make a list. It seemed like the right thing to do, because I could never keep the promises I made for myself and therefore every year started and ended with a glimpse of disappointment. I failed again. Not a great […]
You can be anything they said. Sure, but sooner or later you have to choose a path, a goal, a career or a life purpose – doesn’t matter what you call it, this decision is one of the hardest in life.
The unbearable lightness of being
So where should I go – I kept on asking. I’ve already finished studying, I should know better. I should be happy for the unnumbered options I have, but I felt insecure instead. What if I choose wrong? What if I picked the wrong school in the first place? What if I don’t know what I really like? And by like I mean I-would-be-happy-for-doing-this-for-the-rest-of-my-life kind of liking.
Does this sound familiar? We’ve all been there. So now I decided to share the method that helped me a lot. You just have to answer four questions honestly.
The last speech
Let’s imagine we’re on your funeral. What should be said about you?
“Her art inspired a lot of us. She will be remembered forever.”
“Nobody could cook quite like him.”
“He was a wonderful person, a loving husband and the perfect dad.”
“I want to live my life as calmly as she did.”
“He always gave me cookies, without asking.”
This way it’s so much easier to see what really matters in your life and what you do only because it is expected from you. Write down a few sentences you actually would be proud of hearing and than go on to the next question.
Back to the future
Remember what you dreamt about as a child?
As children we see the world and our future selves from a different perspective. We are not bound by the will of others, we don’t care about financial stability and being acknowledged by society is not one of the most important tasks we wish to accomplish.
In this section you are about to examine two questions: What were your dream jobs as a child? And what features did they have in common? As for me I wanted to be a florist, an actress and a writer. (Yes, all at the same time.) What is similar in between them? Creativity, independence and the urge to create or express something. We moved a step forward again.
Life purpose and the Flow
What were you doing when the rest of the world seemed to have disappeared? When you got so involved in the given task that you didn’t feel hunger or tiredness?
It doesn’t have to be something fancy or magnificent or noble. It can be anything, like playing on the computer or listening to music. When you have it, you just have to look deep inside and find what really fascinates you in that activity.
For example I just loved to play The Sims (secretly of course, it wasn’t that cool back than). I enjoyed creating a whole new world of imagination where I can control the storyline
and the swimming pool’s construction: with or without ladder.
And the winner is…
… something (un)expected?
You just have to merge your answers and try to look for something where your chosen features are present. In the beginning it may not be the Holy Grail, but think about it: you have a crucial information of yourself in you hands which now you can use. It helped me to identify my own desires, now it’s easier to tell them apart from other people’s expectations (which I tended to misinterpret as my own).
No matter which path you choose, one thing is certain: you will have to practice a lot. Hard work is your best friend, so do something for your goal every day, practice whenever you can – like I’m doing it right now, writing this post. Now go and find your life purpose! 🙂
Huge thanks to the Wait But Why blog, their article on taming the mammoth inspired me a lot!
Panic station What could be the perfect gift for Christmas – the eternal question rises again. It is quite a common belief that our love, capability and our stress tolerance will be tested. But don’t panic, you can’t lose in this game: if you give […]